Spaces that Regulate

Lauren shares how small environmental changes can boost calm and regulation, plus quick fixes when you can’t change the space.

In this episode, Lauren takes a thoughtful look at the often overlooked impact our environments have on regulation and well-being. She explores how seemingly small elements like lighting, layout, sound, and even clutter can either support or sabotage our nervous systems. Drawing from both personal examples and brain-based strategies, Lauren shows how to create spaces that cue safety and calm, whether at home, in a classroom, or in an office. She also shares quick, practical ways to regulate when you cannot change the space itself, from portable sensory tools to small rituals that signal a shift.

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Transcript:

Lauren Spigelmyer: All right, we're talking calm rooms. Maybe not what you initially think of when you think calm room, but creating spaces that regulate. This can apply to really anything like your home, your bedroom, your office, your office at home, your office in the office, your office as a whole, your classroom, your school as a whole. And I know we have some limited control over like schools and offices and things like that, but within your own classroom, within your own office, you have a little bit more autonomy, maybe not as a collective whole space, but anyhow, we're just gonna talk about some things that help us to stay regulated because environments can really trigger or even settle through your nervous system. There are some environmental things that can happen that are probably micro level triggering your nervous system and you don't even know it. For example, the volume of sound in a city will trigger your nervous system, like the decibels are too high, and based on how our bodies were built and our brains were designed in the human species, anything at too high of a decibel level is disruptive. Maybe not majorly, but microly, which wears away at your mental capacity and your productivity and your ability to just stay focused and just not be so tired. But even things like being near an airport, like where we live in Arizona, it's not too far from an airport. You can hear the airplanes going over and it's kind of cool, like airplanes are going over, but it's, like, less cool when it's at night. And when you're working, it... It seems cool, but it also is like kind of triggering to nervous system, like, danger. There's an airplane flying overhead, an unnatural thing. So, even if you don't feel scared of it, your body is like hyper aware around the subconscious level. Talk about some things do today help kind of create a space that feels a little bit more calm. And I'm not saying like turn your house into a Zen den and become a meditating hippie. Not that there's anything wrong with meditation or hippies, but actually maybe take a page out of their books, but you don't need to have like plants everywhere. You don't need to have only neutrals. Your space can still feel like you. Just what are some things that we could do to help cue safety? And if we do that, then our system won't become so dysregulated. All right, so think about like, it's making it hard, but when you walk into different classrooms, if you're a teacher, when you walk into different office spaces, if you're in an office space, when you walk into different people's homes or have recently walked into people's homes, when you walk in those spaces, what does it feel like? Like, do you feel like an immediate exhale, like, this feels so calm. I'm at peace. This space on a subconscious level, or now that I'm thinking about it, I know on a conscious level, feels really calm. Or do you feel like on a little bit of a subconscious level, you're kind of bracing, like, oh gosh, there's stuff everywhere, or wow, it's really loud, like both loud, like visually or loud auditorily. A prime example is when people come into my home, my home home, my house, the one you can kind of see in the background, which you can't really see all of if you're watching the video, if you're listening on the audio that you can't hear or that you can't see, you can't hear, you can't see the background. But the living space, which is actually typically my background, but I moved my desk is pretty peaceful and pretty calming. Like I'm pretty intentional about bringing in live plants, not a ton, but enough. I have some really warm, inviting colors. I try to really aesthetically balance it out. I brought in some art that has really calming aesthetics. I have a lot of natural elements, like wood-based elements. And there's nothing too bright or too sharp or things that would lead to fear or lack of safety. And what's interesting is I did very intentionally design my space, but when people walk in here all the time, they comment on it. And I think that it's not so much that they're like visually like, wow, you're like an interior designer. I don't think that has anything to do with it. I think it's they feel so calm. They feel the essence of the space and the space exudes common safety. So, it's not magic and I don't have some kind of special skill, although I do have a nervous system skill, but I don't have some special like interior design skill or design skill. It's just knowing the nervous system and what cues it to safety. This, any space, all the spaces, even when you go to restaurants, you'll feel this. Everything, anything, they all signal something to your brain and what we want it to signal to your brain or to kids brains is you're in a safe place. This is a safe place. This place exudes safety and calm and peace. Not prepare yourself for battle unless you are going into a space that you do want to be in a little bit more like battle like energy. Like if you're going into a gym, you might not want a super calm gym like a yoga studio maybe. But a gym, maybe you do want brighter colors or sharper elements or things that kind of like will wake you up and put your body in a like subtle sense of fear because you want adrenaline pumping through your body so that you can get a good workout in. it really just depends on where you're at, but your home, your office, your classroom, you don't want those to be spaces that are people are gearing up for battle.

Lauren Spigelmyer: Okay, so let's talk a little bit just quickly about how spaces shape your nervous system state. So, the nervous system is constantly scanning. It's consciously and subconsciously kind of like looking around the room, like you're not even aware of it, it's doing it and some of us, especially those that have experienced trauma or a lot of chronic stress, we become hypervigilant. So, we are even more unconsciously aware of the cues in the space. And that's a lot of people right now because a lot of people, see, a lot of people's states and nervous systems are overwhelmed with sensory input so they become a little bit more reactive to all things around them on a subconscious level. So, a nervous system is scanning what it's basically saying or asking really is, am I safe? And of course, yes, in my office, in my home, I'm whatever, of course I feel safe. But even though you logically know that, your subconscious might be telling you a different story or even though you feel safe, someone else might feel at the subconscious or conscious level unsafe. So, what are some things that will cue or cause threat? Visual clutter- If you're person with a really messy desk or a house that has things all over your place and this doesn't necessarily apply to like parents that have kids that have toys everywhere, but yeah, it does. So, here's a perfect example of this. Emerson, my son just turned three and we have a handful of toys. We don't have like an exorbitant amount of toys. I don't have a huge house and I don't have a lot of storage in the house. And I don't feel that he needs a ton of toys. And I definitely don't like toys that like light up and are bright colors and like minimal of that, like calmer things. So, a lot of his toys are in his closet, but I did get some storage for inside of his room. We brought in all these new toys from his party this weekend. And like, wow, we have a lot more toys and they don't fit. They don't fit in the room. And not only do they not fit in the room, but we've collected too many things in the room and I felt like I felt overwhelmed going into his playroom. And I could tell he did because what would happen is he'd get one toy out and he'd get the next toy out and the next toy ou and suddenly it's chaos. And then I could see his energy getting like really loud and really fast. And he'd start to throw things and then things are breaking. And it was just too much stimulation. So, I'm like, okay, let's reorient. I'm gonna move some things to the garage. I'm gonna sell some things. I'm gonna take out basically half of what's in this room right now. And I actually worked with AI and I was like, okay, here's a picture of my space. I need you to get to this level of achievement. This is what I wanna feel. This is what I wanted it look like. This is what I have. Help me organize it. Tell me where to put it. Help me create like sections of the room. Like this is the reading section and this is the activity section and this is the art section. And it did a really good job of helping me kind of feed it nervous system based calming cues to create a space I wanted and then I put everything in that space that way and removed stuff and sold stuff and put stuff in the garage and I walk into it and my body feels completely different. I walk in and I'm like, huh, oh my gosh, it feels so nice to be in here because there's not so much visual clutter and physical clutter all over the place and he is calmer because if he does want more toys, he has to go into the closet and get them out. And I'm kind of monitoring that where I'm like one or two things out at a time. The more you get out, the more dysregulated you get. So we're gonna limit it. If you wanna get something else out, you're certainly welcome, but you gotta put something back. So we instituted more of a system like that, which is what we had initially had in place, but then we just kept adding more toys and I couldn't fit them in the closet. So, we started storing them in the room. That all changed.

Lauren Spigelmyer: Here's another thing that will cue threat, your lighting. If you have a lot of fluorescence and you wouldn't have been able to control this in your office or your classroom, that fluorescent lighting has a hum. It's really bright. It's really artificial. It's unnatural. So that is going to cause some dysregulation. That said, you might be able to manipulate it by bringing in warmer lights to offset it, or maybe you can get like light covers if the fire standards approve of it, but just be aware of your lighting, your noise. Some of your noise you're gonna be able to control. Can't control airplanes flying overhead, can't control being in a city, but can you again, like, mask the noise with bringing in other noise that is calming noise to override that noise? Or can you bring in like white noise? So, you might not be able to remove the noise, but can you again like... buffer it with differing noise. And even like disorganization of any sense, like are your wall things disorganized? Are your books disorganized? What would it look like to have an organizational structure? And even if not like a type A organizational person, this is still true for everyone. Like you may not enjoy doing that, so maybe have someone else do it for you or hire someone or bring in a team or invite people to support you in it, but your subconscious body, your nervous system is still reading that and still benefits from the organization of that. Calm environments, clear environments, organized environments cue the parasympathetic nervous system, inviting regulation, inviting kind of cooperation, attention, creativity, focus. We want that. We want that of classrooms, we want that of office spaces, we want that of like medical practice spaces, any shared spaces. So, just keep that in mind.

Lauren Spigelmyer: Okay, I'm just going to run through a couple easy upgrades that will help you regulate. Some of them I already mentioned. Let's go into each category. Lighting. Use warm lights. Use desk lamps. Use natural light if possible. Turn off flip fluorescence if you can. What is something that feels like a more natural warm and biting light? Use that.

Sound. Try to add some soft background music. Like I mentioned, you could do classical music, you could do white noise, you could do binaural beats, you could do isochronic tones. Binaural beats are hard because you need headphones for those, but still. You could even just bring in things that reduce the noise, like noise dampening rugs or curtains or felt boards or like foam pieces or anything that would soak up sound, even plants and soil and things like that. They soak up the sound. Water soaks up sound. Can you bring any water elements in? Plus the dual benefit of water is that water is really regulating. So, hearing it, seeing it, touching it, drinking it, all of it is really regulating.

What about the layout and the flow of your space? Like I said, I kind of described the playroom and... how it had sections. There's a really calming, low energy reading section that's opposite the section that has the trampoline and the treadmill and the hopping stuff and the kids weights. That's a really active station. And then in between the two is the art station with like desks and chairs and art supplies. And they're all very distinctively separate. So, making paths wide, making movement predictable, making sure that it's easy to get in and out, like, if an office space feels like something is blocking the exit, that can cause psychological unsafety. So, just making sure that there are clear and wide pathways and it's easy to navigate and it seems visually organized. And then just kind of along the same lines of creating pathways and flow and movement spaces, anchor spaces, which is more like- Does each part of the room have a defined purpose? Like, do you have, if you're in a classroom, like a reading corner, an art corner, an active corner. If you're in your office, do you have like a calming spot that's like a breath spot or a meditation spot or a zen spot? Are there staff break areas or nooks, even if they're like in a closet? Like, what, what anchor spaces do we have? Anchor spaces means spaces I can go to feel calm and anchor down and ground down.

Lauren Spigelmyer: Okay, let's talk about what are some portable things if you can't influence your space very much. What are some portable regulation tools, cues, things you could have, bring in, add to the spaces? So, think of sensory tools first. Sensory is one that's like we're often overstimulated, so how do we give our sensory system some stimulation that's down regulating or maybe we need to upregulate if we're in a draw and we feel like kind of groggy. You could bring in something of scent. So like essential oil or a little roller. I kind of keep both, keep like little micro bottles of essential oils that I really love. I tend to really love woods based scents, cedarwoods and the wood. Or I do a little like roller. You can buy a glass roller and add your own oils. So we keep those just kind of handy. I also keep like a Spray bottle, and I think it's like lavender and cedarwood or something in it. And I like that one to spray around the house. I might even want like a fidget object. I don't usually use fidget objects, but I've seen a lot and just think of like the ones that a lot of kids would use. They work the same as an adult and you can probably find an adult based option of the kid version. Soft textures like scarves or blankets or pillows or soft rugs. Like, I would encourage you all to sit on the floor a little bit more. I mean, it depends on where you're at and how clean or dirty your floor is, but floor sitting is really beneficial for your body. So, if you have a nice cozy rug, it might encourage you to sit in the floor more. If you buy a meditation cushion, which is just like a floor seat, it might encourage you to sit in the floor more. So, what can you bring in that can help you kind of down regulate, even like a foam roller, roll out for a little bit? Trying to think what else do I have in my space? I have some candles, but those may not be, again, fire approved. Plants. That's mostly it. Looking around. A yoga mat to encourage some stretching. A white board to doodle. And then think about, okay, what about rituals that mark a shift? Like lights going on and off, and with a classroom, be careful with this, because I've seen lights going off as like a transition tool, trigger students who have trauma from like nighttime or lights going off. But in your office, that could be a good one. Like, I might do like lights low in the morning when I wake up, I'm moving my morning routine. But when I go into work, I want my lights bright. I want all the windows open. I want the shades open. I want to see the natural light. Maybe it's not even light based, it's just music based. Maybe it's opening a window and getting fresh air. Opening a door. Maybe it's stepping outside and taking a big breath and getting some fresh air. Maybe it's saying like a mantra or a phrase or encouragement to yourself. Like, what kind of ritualistic routine based shift thing can I do in my space to denote like, okay, I'm taking a break or I'm going into the next thing or I'm transitioning to just kind of pair that transition with something that is calming. So, there's like a little couple extra things that you could do that if you can't change your space a whole lot, you could bring in these things or adopt these habits. So, just for a second visualize one of your spaces: your bedroom, your office, your house, your classroom, whatever, visualize that space and just kind of quickly scan. Is there anything in there that could be dysregulating for you or others? Maybe try and get like a list of three. And then are there any things that you could do to shift those three things? Can you remove them? Can you bring in something else? Can you mask or buffer with something else? And then don't try and tackle all three this week. Just pick one of those three things to tackle this week. And then next week, maybe work on two. And then next week, work on three and improve from there.

Lauren Spigelmyer: Okay, that's it in a nutshell, how to modify your space. It's more important than you think it might be, I'm telling you. But, if you want to learn more about all things like this, like space and nervous system regulation, office space, morning routines and children's behavior and your behavior and patterns and subconscious and all the things, that is why we created a program called the Behavior Breakthrough. It's an online course through the University of Pennsylvania and you can get 4.5 credits for it. Designed for teachers, designed for early childhood. We have one for early childhood, one for K to 4 and one for 5 to 12. So, same course, but modified for three different age groups. And we are going to run it summer, fall, and spring. We're finishing up the summer cohort. Fall cohort is gonna run here really soon, middle of September. So, if you want to learn more about this or you might be interested in taking it, anyone can take it. It's an asynchronous course. There are a couple on live touch points, but primarily asynchronous. You work through it your own pace and a good one. The feedback we've been getting from it is so awesome. I'm so excited to share it with more and more people. So, if you're interested in learning more about it, you're definitely welcome to click the link in the show notes. If you're listening through another program that you don't have the show notes, you can go to our website, fiveives.com. It is on there under our podcast page, but I'm going to read you the link as well. It's kind of long, but I will give it to you in case you want to type it in. It's fiveives, f-i-v-e-i-v-e-s dot com, backslash, courses, backslash, behavior, B-e-h-a-v-i-o-r, no U in there, hyphen, break through, all one word, hyphen, pen, P-E-N-N, as in the university. Type that in, that'll take you right to the landing page. From the landing page, you can register right on that landing page. If you're wanting more information, you can always contact us. If you aren't sure if you wanna register for the fall, but maybe for the spring, you can always join. There's, like, a wait list button to like tell me more. I'm not sure yet, but it's all there for you and we hope to see you inside that course. Okay, don't forget to lock in what you learned today, either like putting in your calendar or making a to-do list or asking someone to join you or asking someone to help you but doing something that puts the learning into action. Because information is great but without action you got nothing. So that's your actionable step, I guess we'll call it. Next episode, we are talking about... not taming transitions is what I'm calling it. And it's creating these tiny little rituals that are really helping to calm what big shifts we have going on daily or weekly or monthly are coming up. And this can apply to you as an adult, it's can apply to children, but we constantly have transitions in our lives. Like every day we have many, many, transitions. So how do we create little rituals that help to calm those transitions so they're not so chaotic? Until next episode, I'm Lauren Spigelmyer and thank you for joining me.


Categories: : Regulation Strategies